What to do when you miss your Mum.

After having a month off from posting I feel ready to get back into some kind of routine where I can post on a semi-regular basis. The break has done me good. Although, can I just deviate for a second and say, when I went to start this post, a pop-up came up asking me if I would like AI to write my blog for me. WTF!!!! I can tell you now that you will never find a blog post or any copy for that matter on my website that has been written by AI! Are we really that uninventive, that lazy that we can't even write posts for our own blogs now? Geez Louise! When I follow someone's blog I want to hear what they have to say and I trust that it has been written by them, using their creative juices. If I found out they were using AI to write their blogs then that would be a deal breaker for me. If you've watched my video on the reading for 2024 then you know that "AUTHENTICITY" is the power word for 2024 and getting AI to write your blogs is not being authentic in your dealings with your readers. Enough said! Back to my post...

So, I'm hoping that 2024 is going to be a better, lighter, and more positive year for me and my family. So far, so good, but we are only on day four and we have along way to go. On New Year's Day I spent nearly the whole day in tears. I felt so bereft. My heart was literally aching for my Mum and nothing I did could soothe it, so I just went with it. Let me tell you, there was definitely some ugly crying going on that day. You know, the type of crying that shakes your whole body. It was so cathartic though and by the next day I felt some of the brain fog lift that has been there since I got that dreaded call from my sister. Each day I genuinely feel lighter and more like 'me'. This morning I even got up, meditated and exercised, all before 6:30am. I am feeling the best I've felt since Mum passed.

Do you remember in the olden days (and I'm talking real olden days) when you would be expected to wear black for months on end and have a period of grieving where you abstained from all things fun? It just shows how little we knew back then about the grieving process. I personally think that we never really stop grieving for our loved ones when they pass. I think that the way we feel our grief changes though, and this allows us to experience happiness again, in amongst the memories and anniversaries, the good days and bad days. My Stepfather passed away in 2017 and there are times when I will be going about my day, minding my own business, when I hear one of his favourite songs. It stops me dead in my tracks and emotion sweeps over me as I try to hold it together until I can get to a place where I can have a cry. Sometimes they are sad tears and sometimes they are happy tears but the emotion behind them is still as strong as they were in 2017. That emotion is buried somewhere in my body, possibly in my lungs where Chinese Medicine believes we hold our grief, and it waits until the most inopportune moment to rear its head, usually in a supermarket or at a set of lights. I think my Stepfather would find that rather funny.

Processing our emotions is something of great interest to me, as I believe that all of our physical ailments are caused by emotions and experiences being held in the body. It's why I became a Reiki Practitioner and an Australian Bush Flower Essence Practitioner. I wanted to find ways to heal our bodies that didn't involve chemical intervention. My research has led me down quite a few rabbit holes but the information is just so interesting and I can't wait to share some of it with you when the time is right.

So, I just want to say one last thing before I close off this post. If you're grieving right now, number one, I'm so sorry that you're hurting. It sucks. I'm sending you an energetic hug. Secondly, don't be afraid to let it all out. Really, just sob until there is nothing left. You will look absolutely woeful (puffy eyes, red face) but you will feel a sense of freedom, and lastly don't be afraid to reach out and ask for help if you feel you're not coping. Don't bottle it up. There are people who want to be there for you, to comfort you, to sit with you. Let them.

Until next time...

Photo Credit: Dmitry Ganin - Unsplash

Photo Credit: Kelly Sikkema - Unsplash